Dear Friends:
“If it bleeds, it ledes.”
This well-known journalistic cliché expresses a deep truth. We humans seem to prefer bad news over good news. Bad news sells newspapers. Good news doesn’t. Why is this? In his book The Universal Christ, Fr. Richard Rohr, Franciscan friar and spiritual teacher, observes:
Brain studies have shown that we may be hardwired to focus on problems at the expense of a positive vision. The human brain wraps around fear and problems like Velcro. We dwell on bad experiences long after the fact and spend vast amounts of energy anticipating what might go wrong in the future.
Conversely, positivity and gratitude and simple happiness slide away like cheese on hot Teflon. Studies like the ones done by the neuropsychologist Rick Hanson show that we must consciously hold on to a positive thought or feeling for a minimum of fifteen seconds before it leaves any imprint in the neurons.
The whole dynamic, in fact, is called the Velcro/Teflon model of the mind. We are more attracted to the problem than to the solution, you might say.
— Richard Rohr, The Universal Christ: How a Forgotten Reality Can Change Everything We See, Hope For, and Believe (Convergent Books, 2019, 2021), 64–65.
The Velcro/Teflon effect seems mighty familiar to me. There’s an abundance of bad news these days. Have you noticed? How easy is it for us to perseverate on all the negative swirling around us while forgetting the many blessings of our lives.
Do you know what “doomscrolling” is? It’s the obsessive/compulsive focus on our devices’ newsfeeds, scrolling from one outrage to the next. An easy trap to fall into, but one that is sure to guarantee anxiety and despair, yet we are reflexively drawn to it.
What’s the way out of this unhealthy loop? Practicing gratitude. Making an intentional practice to enjoy a positive response with a grateful heart no matter the darkness of the moment.
Making a practice to focus on the good, the true, and the beautiful—of which there is an abundance in each of our lives!
The Apostle Paul was in prison under sentence of death when he wrote these remarkable words to the little church in Philippi:
Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, Rejoice. Let your gentleness be known to everyone. The Lord is near. Do not worry about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Finally, beloved, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is pleasing, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence and if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. Keep on doing the things that you have learned and received and heard and seen in me, and the God of peace will be with you.
— Philippians 4:4–9
I would say that Paul had mastered the Velcro/Teflon problem.
Focused on the virtues and on the beauty of the created order, giving thanks for the blessings of this life and thinking on the things that are worthy of praise allowed him to transcend his immediate peril and to experience “the peace that passes all understanding.”
How about us? How might we rewire our neural pathways to transcend the doom loop of life in these challenging days and live in the positive?
A good way to start is to practice gratitude. In her wonderful meditation that she shared with us on Thanksgiving Day, Lisa Tompkins Holden let us in on her practice of gratitude:
Since 1995, at the recommendation of Sarah Ban Breathnach, who wrote Simple Abundance, I have kept a gratitude journal and written in it 95% of all mornings. In my own experience, taking the time to write five things for which I am grateful has caused me to shift my perspective — I actually experience more things for which to be grateful, and when something doesn’t go my way, I ask, “Is there anything in this situation that I am grateful for?” A couple of years ago, I added something else. I ask myself each morning, “Where did I see God/Love moving yesterday?” This has been an incredible added bonus to my practice.
If you struggle to look at life as gift, can you try asking God to show you one small thing you can do to shift your focus and also to help you to take that step?
The practice of writing down every day five things for which we might be grateful, getting it out of our heads and onto paper, is a kind of rewiring of our neural pathways. It can be transformative.
“How then shall we wait?” That’s the presenting question as Advent rolls around every year.
If we are at all observant, we know that we are waiting for the coming of the Messiah, the Deliverer, the Divine Abstract becoming material reality as a baby is born two thousand years ago and thousands of miles away.
Fr. John Pitzer reminded us in his fine sermon last Sunday that the theme of the First Sunday in Advent is Hope. So we wait with Hope for the One who is to come.
But what does that waiting with hope really look like? In other words, what is our practice of waiting?
As I’ve been wondering, as we say in Godly Play, about the practice of waiting with hope, I’ve begun to make a connection between the practice of hopeful waiting and the practice of gratitude.
Can waiting in Hope rewire our neural pathways?
In my note to you last week as we observed Thanksgiving, I was reminded of that line from the General Thanksgiving that we are called to “show forth our praise not only with our lips but in our lives.”
Take Lisa’s example and write down something(s) for which you are grateful every day. And give thanks not only with your lips but in your life.
Give generously this Christmas to Essential Envelopes, which supports organizations providing a year-end boost to families who are trying to keep food on the table in this holiday season.
You can also support Episcopal Migration Ministries, the Church’s outreach arm to migrants around the world for over 80 years.
This year the need is on our own doorstep, as many of the immigrant families so important to the fabric of our city are experiencing food insecurity.
By making a donation directly to Trinity designated for Migration Ministries, you can compassionately support these neighbors.
Or give directly to Hope House, supporting indigent and needy people requiring assistance of all kinds right here in our neighborhood.
This just scratches the surface of tangible ways you can practice gratitude. Be mindful of the goodness of this life, even amidst its challenges.
Live in Hope in the One who is to come. Practicing gratitude has the power to rewire our neural pathways. Practicing gratitude will transform us.
May we ever be mindful in this Advent season that when we welcome into our lives the hungry, the ones who have no place to lay their heads at night, the stranger, the sick, the friendless, we are welcoming Christ himself.
— Matthew 25:31, et seq.
Many blessings for you and all the ones you love,
Lex
