You Get What You Need

13Jul
But not all have obeyed the good news; for Isaiah says, ‘Lord, who has believed our message?’ So faith comes from what is heard, and what is heard comes through the word of Christ.
But I ask, have they not heard? Indeed they have; for
‘Their voice has gone out to all the earth and their words to the ends of the world.’
Then Isaiah is so bold as to say “I was found by those who did not seek me; I revealed myself to those who did not ask for me.”  
-Romans 10:16-18, 20

Jesus was the fulfillment of the Law and of the songs of the Prophets. He was given so you and I can enjoy lives at one, that is, atoned with God in every moment of our passage through this life. It is not a promise of a life without toil, or loss, or sorrow. I’m not sure, but anecdotally, I believe all the bumps and scrapes and the hard work are, in fact, part of the promise. We were atoned with our God through Christ so we could enjoy the Fruits of the Spirit by Faith, not by works, but by our Faith. It is by our Faith that we are healed through loss and sorrow. It is by our Faith that we look up to see past the results of greedy and selfish intentions. 

This being at Love with God is a dense relationship. It is why “living in the moment” is not some lifeskill or touch-phrase for self-actualization. “Living in the moment” is literally a vital requirement of a Faith walk with God, because it is in THIS moment that God waits for us, to love, to teach, to heal, to give sight. Paul’s call to pray without ceasing is a call to turn our lives into prayer so we are open to God’s Grace in this, and every moment. It’s the loveliest of gifts.

Why then, am I so prone to practice complacent faith. Why do I let fear and selfish intentions take my eye and my heart out of the moment and away from the Love of God. 

That’s why I didn’t see it coming, from the moment I met Aaron in April 1997, and not until the last words I heard from him. I was working at a sleepy architecture office on Carondelet St. I was living in the mess fearful and selfish intentions had created. But it was work; for that I was grateful. Aaron was a stocky, unshaven black man, about my age, only he didn’t wear it well. He held out a wrinkled, paper coffee cup, silently asking for money. At first I was annoyed that I couldn’t have lunch without being confronted with That!

Every day Aaron was there. Eventually I began buying him food. By fall we had exchanged names; we talked. He used to buy and sell goods from the trunk of his car to the ladies in the Projects. He called it “The Trade”. His car had died, and he was unable to fix it. Years later he was there, in front of Mary’s Deli on Carondelet St. His voice was muted under a gravely cloak of lost hope. He spoke as an old-school black man – shy and respectful, but with a hint of dignity. By fall, I would invite him into sandwich shops to lunch with me. 

On the 22nd of December, I brought him a pile of gifts. I wrapped them all for Christmas. A wool suit, white shirt, and a Perlis tie. A dark blue wool overcoat - all from Goodwill. I wrapped a canned ham and a non-perishable Christmas feast for him. He was uncharacteristically quiet. Grateful. Deeply surprised. 

I didn’t see Aaron until the day after the New Year. It was bitterly cold, He was at his station, “dressed to the nines”, in front of Mary’s Deli. He did not have a cup. I invited him in for a cup of soup. He wanted only the company and a cup of coffee. We talked a bit. There was a long pause in the conversation. Aaron said in a remarkably clear voice, “Marsden, you’re carrying around a passle of woes, aren’t you?” I mumbled something dismissive. He interrupted me, “You do. I know you do.” “Listen to me…everything is going to be all right.” He placed his hand over mine. In the clear voice of a younger man he said, “ Everything is going to work out. I know it. “ I couldn’t speak as my eyes filled. Arron left me alone in Mary’s Deli. I never saw him again. 

On January 12th I received a call from the NOCCA Institute to offer me the position of in-house architect. To be very clear, this is not a story about a transaction. It is a story about my eyes being opened by Faith so I could be in the moment with God, unburdened by fear. I revealed myself to those who did not ask for me. I was found by those I did not seek.

This is what we are to do with our moments. All of them.

Musical Reflection

You Can't Always Get What You Want - Rolling Stones

Gracious Lord. Thank you for your patience with our complacent Faith. Amen.
Faith

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